The day before I gave birth to my dear son I had a midwife appointment for a stress test and ultrasound to make sure everything was going well with Liam. All was great. I was 3cm, 80% effaced, and Liam sat at a 0 station at 41 weeks pregnant. After my pelvic check, my midwife Nancy swept my membranes without me knowing until she removed her hand full off blood and mucus and said " and that's sweeping the membranes". Nancy has been a midwife for 25+ years and really knew her stuff. She told me that I would have Liam in the next few days. I didn't believe her as I was already a week late and thought I would be pregnant forever! That night we ordered pizza, made sure the bags were packed, and watched TV until midnight. If I could go back, I would have slept the second I got home from my appointment! I went to bed and wasn't expecting what happened next...
I woke up before 4am and had very bad cramping and had to go to the bathroom. I didn't throw up but my body emptied itself in other ways. So after 15 minutes in the bathroom I found myself sweating, and was now shaking. I walked out to the living room to tell my mom what I was feeling and grabbed a glass of water and crawled back into bed. As soon as I wrapped my body around my body pillow I got my first surge or as you may know contraction. I had slept 4 hours and just knew this was not a false alarm. I shook my husbands shoulder and told him he better get to work and then get his butt back home. We then snuggled in bed as I continued to have surges about 1-4 minutes apart and held his hand and breathed through them. Patrick looked me in the eyes, tucked my hair behind my ears and said "I love you". He then hurried out of bed and peeled out in his camaro and left for work.
I continued to labor at home with my mom. I had now moved to the couch with my body pillow, heating pad, and a bowl as I felt very queasy. I lay there and the surges continued and grew stronger and stronger. I vocalized through every one of them and saved my energy. I would make "oooh's, ahhh's, and mhmm's". Noises that were deep and helped loosen my lips. To my neighbors, I probably sounded like a dying farm animal. After keeping track of my contractions and them being 2-4 minutes apart, it was time to call Nancy and alert her that today we would be having our dear son. She told me to continue to labor at home until my surges were constant and not so spaced. So I continued to lay on the couch as my uterus took over my body and mind. I would occasionally get up to use the bathroom and pace around the apartment until I was forced to grab the nearest object to support my body on as my body was consumed. My surges were now coming more regularly and grew stronger. I then began to think to myself, I'm crazy for doing this naturally until I looked over at his ultrasound photo. I then smiled and said to myself I can do it. After my husband returned home, he loaded the bags in the car, while I called Nancy and it was time to head to the birth center.
I dreaded the car ride but it wasn't that bad. Probably because my husband turned the hazard lights on and flew down the parkway. I grabbed overhead and held onto my "ohh s&#*" bars in my car, and continued to be vocal and sing my "mothers song" as the midwives called it. We pulled into the birth center and walked in. Not even a minute in the lobby we heard another woman in labor. I continue to lean on my husband arms wrapped around him or on any close sturdy object as waves continued to consume me. Minutes later we heard the woman scream and then applause followed by a baby cry. I had just heard a woman give birth, something I would be doing that same day. I was filled with emotion and my eyes welled up. I looked over to my mom who started crying and then my husband who just had a look I had never seen him wear before. Heidi the nurse said they had to prepare our birth suite and get the family who just delivered settled before we started with me, so she suggested we walk around the building and eat something. I had half a banana and sipped powerade between surges. So Pat grabbed my hand and we started walking. I continued to smile and talk to my husband about the coming moments of meeting our son. I walked and walked and stopped when I couldn't move. The birthing center was now open for scheduled appointments and people started to pull up while I labored in the parking lot. I bet I scared a few women. I was still very vocal and swayed my hips leaning on pillars and my car while people entered and left the birthing center. I entered the lobby and It was now time to get hooked up to the monitor to see how Liam and my body were handling labor.
The pink and blue straps hugged my belly, Pat held my hand and head, and my mom held the camera and took pictures. I listened to liams heartbeat and watched the number that recorded contractions go from the 40's to 120's until I couldn't. I hated laying there watching the results print out and listening to the machine. It reminded me of what I didn't want. Minutes later Nancy walked in removed the contraption and said everything looks great and welcomed me to active labor. She checked me and I was now at 4cm, and 90% effaced. I wouldn't be leaving here without my baby in my arms and I was excited. I had prepared myself for this moment and this was it. After walking around for over and hour, I could not wait to get back into my room. I threw myself on the bed with my arms wrapped around the birthing ball while my husband and mom unloaded the bags from the car.
It wasn't long before the surges grew more intense and frequent. I felt like my uterus was swallowing me whole. I had been so calm up until this point. My vocals grew and pressure started. I stripped down to just my sports bra and got in the shower. My husband changed into his swim trunks and was there with me the whole time. He rubbed my back, sprayed me with the removable shower head, held me, and encouraged me to stay strong while he looked me in the eyes. I could see the pain he felt from my labor pain in his eyes. I kneeled in the shower over a pull down bench with a cushion under my knees as the water soothed my back and stomach while I swayed my hips and sung my song of "oohh's, ahhh's, and mhmm's". After about 15 minutes of that after falling to my knees I needed to lay down. So I placed the cushion I kneeled on under my head and laid down. I felt lifeless. The water beaded and fell down my face. It was somewhat annoying but I could not take focus off of my surges. The midwife came in with the Doppler to check Liam and laughed as she found me in the shower lying down. She asked if I wanted to get in the tub and I said yes. You have to be 6-7cms to get im the tub otherwise your labor can hault. She checked me and I was 6cm and 100% effaced. I do not recall times as the clock wasn't something I stared at. The tub was filled and I hopped in. The pain was instantly lessened and I found comfort. The sound and feel of water really soothed me and my mind. I had a relaxation CD playing and just wiggled and swayed in the tub for a bit while Pat switched out ice cold washcloths for my forehead and neck. My mom sat in the rocking chair teary eyed seeing me in pain. I was drained and had no energy so I needed to eat. Pat cut me up and apple and dipped it in peanut butter. My mouth was so dry so the last thing I wanted was a huge chunk of PB. I went to spread it with my finger and it fell in the tub. We laughed and I continued to eat the apple that I hadn't dropped. I still was drinking water and powerade and sipped on a cup of apple sauce as well.
When I had to use the bathroom I would go and then shower before entering the tub as I was bleeding pretty heavily. One particular time after going potty I felt increased pressure. I began to become whiney. I had felt like I had been in labor forever and began to grow weak. I felt like a sidewalk who had tree roots growing up into it as it cracked. I was losing my state of mind. Not only had my surges taken over my body but now my mind. I couldnt think, find words, or even make choices. I felt like I needed to push so we got back into the tub and I tried. Well after 5 minutes of pushing the midwife recommended a check and that I save my energy. I was now 8cm and was still 100% effaced. Her and my nurse needed to turn Liam into a better position so that he would decend a little easier into the birth canal. Nancy kept her hand inside me on Liam's head while Heidi turned him pushing and rubbing my belly. After 15 minutes he turned and his back was now along my belly and not my left side. This is when things turned. As soon as Nancy removed her hands and I began to move to hands and knees to keep Liam in his new position my water broke. I was moving while I had a strong contraction so I imagined it as having a water balloon squeezed and then burst. I of course was in a different world then my mom and husband but from what I was told it was mostly blood and fluid. The nurse and midwife always had to change my underpads on the bed. I kneeled over the ball while Pat took the tennis ball to my back until I couldn't find comfort. Then it was back to the shower. I started to scream. The pressure and surges became more then I could handle. Everyone around me kept encouraging me and all I could do was respond with a very whiny "I'm trying". At one point my husband said I know and I told him "No, you don't know" and bursted into tears. I was not a mean, rude, cursing lady in labor but more so a whiny one. I am never one to be mad and angry and this wasn't the time. I stand in the shower held up by my husband as I whined to myself and had a conversation with my son in utero. I knew I was getting close. I would say things like "hurry baby boy, mama wants to meet you" and "I'm doing it, I'm gonna have my baby". Time passed and I was still pregnant.
I asked to be checked and I was 9cm! Only one left to go. I continued to labor everywhere I had listed and grew weaker and weaker until tears fell down my cheeks and my lungs and throat hurt. The nurse and midwife came in and said they think its time I try and rest. I went into this not wanting any interventions. I looked at my husband and mom and knew it was best. I had looked at the clock as the midwife gave me a shot in the hip of nubain. It was 6pm. I had been in labor 14 hours on 4 hours of sleep. I couldn't make decisions and was glad my midwife did that for me. I was also given a tincture under my tounge and snuggled in bed with Pat. I had a pillow between my knees, the heating pad on my back, and I was soaked with sweat and water. My husband rubbed my back with the tennis ball over the pad as I drifted off between contractions. During them I would talk, be vocal, or keep quiet and clench my toes and fists. 15 minutes after the shot I felt no different then before. I was supposed to be calm and sleeping even through contractions and I wasn't. The shot did nothing for me. I think that is when my mind and body really relaxed and I was able to fully dilate. I felt immense pressure that was worse then before but kept quiet as I didn't want to hear I was still 9cm. So I lay there whining to my husband and mom as I stare at the head board of the bed with heavy eyes as I had contractions every minute and my water and blood continued to gush out of me. I waited as long as I could and I couldnt take it. I had my mom call the midwife. I told her I need to push...I had been saying that for hours now though so I'm sure she thought I was crazy.
She checked me and I was 10cm! It was baby time. When she said that a flip switched in my head. I don't remember much of this part. I originally wanted a water birth but could not find myself to get up and walk to the tub. The midwife and nurse prepared their things as I looked to my husband and smiled. My mom stood at the foot of the bed taking pictures. It was time to push. I didn't want to birth in my back but in thay position I felt had the most control. I grabbed my knees, pulled them to my chest as Pat helped with my left side and began to push. I was not told or coached in my pushing. I just pushed when it felt right and when I had a strong contraction. It felt wonderful. After a few practice pushes I heard "I see his head". While pushing I grunted and put all my power into my behind. I wanted to meet my baby boy. Heidi grabbed me the oxygen mask to inhale between pushes and surges for a little boost. I grabbed the mask, pulled it to my face and huffed and puffed it down. Everyone in the room was saying things but it was going in one ear out the other. I had my eyes and mind on my prize. I blocked everyone out. Not intentionally, only because I was focused. Some more pushes and Nancy said " reach down and feel your baby", and I did. I then smiled and was handed a mirror and saw hair. I smiled and looked to my husband. I was just given a huge dose of motivation.
The next few minutes, every contraction I had I pushed and pushed. Nancy and Heidi applied mineral oil and hot towels in hopes that I wouldn't tear. I pushed with all my might until I heard "his head is out"! Then I took in a huge breathe of oxygen and pushed one more final time. I felt another gush as I pushed with a full bladder so that was relieved. With my chin to my chest, knees to my breasts, I screamed and before I could stop myself from screaming I heard my sons first cry as he was being placed on my chest. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on even though in his first minute of life he had peed and pooped on me. My first joys of motherhood right? I was full of smiles and euphoria. I felt no more pain. I had just accomplished natural child birth. I held him close and soaked up that moment with my husband. We were over the moon.
My mom continued to take pictures and wore a worried look on her face. I was so busy with my baby boy that I had no idea I lost 3 bed pans full of blood. I was then given an IV. The next thing to do was deliver the placenta. Heidi massaged my belly for a few minutes. After the cord stopped pulsing, it was clamped and my mom did the honors and Pat was basking in our son alongside me. It had been 20 minutes and after latching Liam and trying to deliver my placenta I had no luck. Liam was handed to my husband for some skin to skin cuddles as I wasn't done just yet. You have up to an hour to deliver your placenta before being rushed to the hospital. All was well with Liam but everyone started worrying about me and I was effected mentally. I began to turn a bit let down. I didn't want to be rushed away and pulled from my baby. I tried pushing and that didn't work. I was given more tincture under my tounge and Heidi injected the cut cord with pitocin to jumpstart my contractions so that we could get this out. After almost an hour and stressing I delivered the placenta just in time of being rushed to the hospital. Both my cord and placenta were irregular in shape and color but they did there job growing a perfectly health baby boy. I had a first degree labial tear as Liam was born with his left hand at his head. I was given some local anesthesic and was stitched up quickly but ouchie did it hurt. Worse then having a baby. It was just one single stitch. I also had a small perineul tear but it didn't need a stitch as it was so small.
Liam was born at 7:42pm weighing 7lbs 14oz and was 21 inches long on March 8th, 2012. I had the most amazing birthing experience and I will do it naturally as long as I have children. I will never forget that day. I don't feel like that same women. My family looks at me differently and so does my husband. I am Superwoman and there isn't a thing I can't do in this world. I am one proud natural mama. It as some of you would say crunchy but I wouldn't have it any other way.
I woke up before 4am and had very bad cramping and had to go to the bathroom. I didn't throw up but my body emptied itself in other ways. So after 15 minutes in the bathroom I found myself sweating, and was now shaking. I walked out to the living room to tell my mom what I was feeling and grabbed a glass of water and crawled back into bed. As soon as I wrapped my body around my body pillow I got my first surge or as you may know contraction. I had slept 4 hours and just knew this was not a false alarm. I shook my husbands shoulder and told him he better get to work and then get his butt back home. We then snuggled in bed as I continued to have surges about 1-4 minutes apart and held his hand and breathed through them. Patrick looked me in the eyes, tucked my hair behind my ears and said "I love you". He then hurried out of bed and peeled out in his camaro and left for work.
I continued to labor at home with my mom. I had now moved to the couch with my body pillow, heating pad, and a bowl as I felt very queasy. I lay there and the surges continued and grew stronger and stronger. I vocalized through every one of them and saved my energy. I would make "oooh's, ahhh's, and mhmm's". Noises that were deep and helped loosen my lips. To my neighbors, I probably sounded like a dying farm animal. After keeping track of my contractions and them being 2-4 minutes apart, it was time to call Nancy and alert her that today we would be having our dear son. She told me to continue to labor at home until my surges were constant and not so spaced. So I continued to lay on the couch as my uterus took over my body and mind. I would occasionally get up to use the bathroom and pace around the apartment until I was forced to grab the nearest object to support my body on as my body was consumed. My surges were now coming more regularly and grew stronger. I then began to think to myself, I'm crazy for doing this naturally until I looked over at his ultrasound photo. I then smiled and said to myself I can do it. After my husband returned home, he loaded the bags in the car, while I called Nancy and it was time to head to the birth center.
I dreaded the car ride but it wasn't that bad. Probably because my husband turned the hazard lights on and flew down the parkway. I grabbed overhead and held onto my "ohh s&#*" bars in my car, and continued to be vocal and sing my "mothers song" as the midwives called it. We pulled into the birth center and walked in. Not even a minute in the lobby we heard another woman in labor. I continue to lean on my husband arms wrapped around him or on any close sturdy object as waves continued to consume me. Minutes later we heard the woman scream and then applause followed by a baby cry. I had just heard a woman give birth, something I would be doing that same day. I was filled with emotion and my eyes welled up. I looked over to my mom who started crying and then my husband who just had a look I had never seen him wear before. Heidi the nurse said they had to prepare our birth suite and get the family who just delivered settled before we started with me, so she suggested we walk around the building and eat something. I had half a banana and sipped powerade between surges. So Pat grabbed my hand and we started walking. I continued to smile and talk to my husband about the coming moments of meeting our son. I walked and walked and stopped when I couldn't move. The birthing center was now open for scheduled appointments and people started to pull up while I labored in the parking lot. I bet I scared a few women. I was still very vocal and swayed my hips leaning on pillars and my car while people entered and left the birthing center. I entered the lobby and It was now time to get hooked up to the monitor to see how Liam and my body were handling labor.
The pink and blue straps hugged my belly, Pat held my hand and head, and my mom held the camera and took pictures. I listened to liams heartbeat and watched the number that recorded contractions go from the 40's to 120's until I couldn't. I hated laying there watching the results print out and listening to the machine. It reminded me of what I didn't want. Minutes later Nancy walked in removed the contraption and said everything looks great and welcomed me to active labor. She checked me and I was now at 4cm, and 90% effaced. I wouldn't be leaving here without my baby in my arms and I was excited. I had prepared myself for this moment and this was it. After walking around for over and hour, I could not wait to get back into my room. I threw myself on the bed with my arms wrapped around the birthing ball while my husband and mom unloaded the bags from the car.
It wasn't long before the surges grew more intense and frequent. I felt like my uterus was swallowing me whole. I had been so calm up until this point. My vocals grew and pressure started. I stripped down to just my sports bra and got in the shower. My husband changed into his swim trunks and was there with me the whole time. He rubbed my back, sprayed me with the removable shower head, held me, and encouraged me to stay strong while he looked me in the eyes. I could see the pain he felt from my labor pain in his eyes. I kneeled in the shower over a pull down bench with a cushion under my knees as the water soothed my back and stomach while I swayed my hips and sung my song of "oohh's, ahhh's, and mhmm's". After about 15 minutes of that after falling to my knees I needed to lay down. So I placed the cushion I kneeled on under my head and laid down. I felt lifeless. The water beaded and fell down my face. It was somewhat annoying but I could not take focus off of my surges. The midwife came in with the Doppler to check Liam and laughed as she found me in the shower lying down. She asked if I wanted to get in the tub and I said yes. You have to be 6-7cms to get im the tub otherwise your labor can hault. She checked me and I was 6cm and 100% effaced. I do not recall times as the clock wasn't something I stared at. The tub was filled and I hopped in. The pain was instantly lessened and I found comfort. The sound and feel of water really soothed me and my mind. I had a relaxation CD playing and just wiggled and swayed in the tub for a bit while Pat switched out ice cold washcloths for my forehead and neck. My mom sat in the rocking chair teary eyed seeing me in pain. I was drained and had no energy so I needed to eat. Pat cut me up and apple and dipped it in peanut butter. My mouth was so dry so the last thing I wanted was a huge chunk of PB. I went to spread it with my finger and it fell in the tub. We laughed and I continued to eat the apple that I hadn't dropped. I still was drinking water and powerade and sipped on a cup of apple sauce as well.
When I had to use the bathroom I would go and then shower before entering the tub as I was bleeding pretty heavily. One particular time after going potty I felt increased pressure. I began to become whiney. I had felt like I had been in labor forever and began to grow weak. I felt like a sidewalk who had tree roots growing up into it as it cracked. I was losing my state of mind. Not only had my surges taken over my body but now my mind. I couldnt think, find words, or even make choices. I felt like I needed to push so we got back into the tub and I tried. Well after 5 minutes of pushing the midwife recommended a check and that I save my energy. I was now 8cm and was still 100% effaced. Her and my nurse needed to turn Liam into a better position so that he would decend a little easier into the birth canal. Nancy kept her hand inside me on Liam's head while Heidi turned him pushing and rubbing my belly. After 15 minutes he turned and his back was now along my belly and not my left side. This is when things turned. As soon as Nancy removed her hands and I began to move to hands and knees to keep Liam in his new position my water broke. I was moving while I had a strong contraction so I imagined it as having a water balloon squeezed and then burst. I of course was in a different world then my mom and husband but from what I was told it was mostly blood and fluid. The nurse and midwife always had to change my underpads on the bed. I kneeled over the ball while Pat took the tennis ball to my back until I couldn't find comfort. Then it was back to the shower. I started to scream. The pressure and surges became more then I could handle. Everyone around me kept encouraging me and all I could do was respond with a very whiny "I'm trying". At one point my husband said I know and I told him "No, you don't know" and bursted into tears. I was not a mean, rude, cursing lady in labor but more so a whiny one. I am never one to be mad and angry and this wasn't the time. I stand in the shower held up by my husband as I whined to myself and had a conversation with my son in utero. I knew I was getting close. I would say things like "hurry baby boy, mama wants to meet you" and "I'm doing it, I'm gonna have my baby". Time passed and I was still pregnant.
I asked to be checked and I was 9cm! Only one left to go. I continued to labor everywhere I had listed and grew weaker and weaker until tears fell down my cheeks and my lungs and throat hurt. The nurse and midwife came in and said they think its time I try and rest. I went into this not wanting any interventions. I looked at my husband and mom and knew it was best. I had looked at the clock as the midwife gave me a shot in the hip of nubain. It was 6pm. I had been in labor 14 hours on 4 hours of sleep. I couldn't make decisions and was glad my midwife did that for me. I was also given a tincture under my tounge and snuggled in bed with Pat. I had a pillow between my knees, the heating pad on my back, and I was soaked with sweat and water. My husband rubbed my back with the tennis ball over the pad as I drifted off between contractions. During them I would talk, be vocal, or keep quiet and clench my toes and fists. 15 minutes after the shot I felt no different then before. I was supposed to be calm and sleeping even through contractions and I wasn't. The shot did nothing for me. I think that is when my mind and body really relaxed and I was able to fully dilate. I felt immense pressure that was worse then before but kept quiet as I didn't want to hear I was still 9cm. So I lay there whining to my husband and mom as I stare at the head board of the bed with heavy eyes as I had contractions every minute and my water and blood continued to gush out of me. I waited as long as I could and I couldnt take it. I had my mom call the midwife. I told her I need to push...I had been saying that for hours now though so I'm sure she thought I was crazy.
She checked me and I was 10cm! It was baby time. When she said that a flip switched in my head. I don't remember much of this part. I originally wanted a water birth but could not find myself to get up and walk to the tub. The midwife and nurse prepared their things as I looked to my husband and smiled. My mom stood at the foot of the bed taking pictures. It was time to push. I didn't want to birth in my back but in thay position I felt had the most control. I grabbed my knees, pulled them to my chest as Pat helped with my left side and began to push. I was not told or coached in my pushing. I just pushed when it felt right and when I had a strong contraction. It felt wonderful. After a few practice pushes I heard "I see his head". While pushing I grunted and put all my power into my behind. I wanted to meet my baby boy. Heidi grabbed me the oxygen mask to inhale between pushes and surges for a little boost. I grabbed the mask, pulled it to my face and huffed and puffed it down. Everyone in the room was saying things but it was going in one ear out the other. I had my eyes and mind on my prize. I blocked everyone out. Not intentionally, only because I was focused. Some more pushes and Nancy said " reach down and feel your baby", and I did. I then smiled and was handed a mirror and saw hair. I smiled and looked to my husband. I was just given a huge dose of motivation.
The next few minutes, every contraction I had I pushed and pushed. Nancy and Heidi applied mineral oil and hot towels in hopes that I wouldn't tear. I pushed with all my might until I heard "his head is out"! Then I took in a huge breathe of oxygen and pushed one more final time. I felt another gush as I pushed with a full bladder so that was relieved. With my chin to my chest, knees to my breasts, I screamed and before I could stop myself from screaming I heard my sons first cry as he was being placed on my chest. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on even though in his first minute of life he had peed and pooped on me. My first joys of motherhood right? I was full of smiles and euphoria. I felt no more pain. I had just accomplished natural child birth. I held him close and soaked up that moment with my husband. We were over the moon.
My mom continued to take pictures and wore a worried look on her face. I was so busy with my baby boy that I had no idea I lost 3 bed pans full of blood. I was then given an IV. The next thing to do was deliver the placenta. Heidi massaged my belly for a few minutes. After the cord stopped pulsing, it was clamped and my mom did the honors and Pat was basking in our son alongside me. It had been 20 minutes and after latching Liam and trying to deliver my placenta I had no luck. Liam was handed to my husband for some skin to skin cuddles as I wasn't done just yet. You have up to an hour to deliver your placenta before being rushed to the hospital. All was well with Liam but everyone started worrying about me and I was effected mentally. I began to turn a bit let down. I didn't want to be rushed away and pulled from my baby. I tried pushing and that didn't work. I was given more tincture under my tounge and Heidi injected the cut cord with pitocin to jumpstart my contractions so that we could get this out. After almost an hour and stressing I delivered the placenta just in time of being rushed to the hospital. Both my cord and placenta were irregular in shape and color but they did there job growing a perfectly health baby boy. I had a first degree labial tear as Liam was born with his left hand at his head. I was given some local anesthesic and was stitched up quickly but ouchie did it hurt. Worse then having a baby. It was just one single stitch. I also had a small perineul tear but it didn't need a stitch as it was so small.
Liam was born at 7:42pm weighing 7lbs 14oz and was 21 inches long on March 8th, 2012. I had the most amazing birthing experience and I will do it naturally as long as I have children. I will never forget that day. I don't feel like that same women. My family looks at me differently and so does my husband. I am Superwoman and there isn't a thing I can't do in this world. I am one proud natural mama. It as some of you would say crunchy but I wouldn't have it any other way.
Love this Lindsey!! you did so good!!!! :) So happy for you!!!
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